Who Are You Callin’ “Cocky”? Us, We Hope
We won’t deny feeling a twinge or twelve of schadenfreude–you remember, our favorite German word for “joy through other people’s misery” (right, Bacchus?)–upon watching the Yankees 6-4 home turf loss to the Indians. However, we are holding good on our promise to temporarily keep the pinstripe jibes to a minimum.
I emphasize “temporarily” because A) we have a reputation to uphold; B) we don’t want to get our Red Sox Nation membership revoked; and C) we plan to lift the self-imposed embargo as soon as the Sox blow past the Indians in the ALCS. And if the Sox lose the ALCS, we’re still lifting the embargo as a consolation prize to ourselves (we’ll need an outlet, won’t we?).
But today, there are greater concerns for New England sports fans. I’m not talking about the playoffs. I’m talking about this public opinion report, sent to me by the always-aware Prospero, which actually contains the sentence, “Red Sox fans are the cockiest this year–81% think their team will win it all.”
Excuse me? Uh, you know, this is very upsetting for a number of reasons. First of all, why is the number so low? Why isn’t it more like 99%? Sure, every fan base has their doubting Thomases, but 19% is an unacceptably high figure. (Quick! Somebody get a memo to Jerry Remy, official President of Red Sox Nation!).
Second, why are Red Sox fans the “cockiest”? What about Pats fans? Aren’t we equally cocky in that guise? And since many Sox fans are Pats fans, shouldn’t there be some kind of cockiness algorithm that makes us, collectively, untouchably smug?
You know, I may have to rethink this whole trash-talking thing. To heck with the Yankees–and the Indians, Diamondbacks, and Rockies. And you know what? To heck with the Colts and Cowboys, too. And once the Bruins and Celtics heat up, to heck with their rivals, too. We New Englanders need to assert ourselves for what we are: THE cockiest fan base in the US, period.
Why be an ardent fan in humilty? Remember what we said about humility? The whole purpose of fervent fandom is to aggravate the opposing teams’ fans–unless they’re Gossip on Sports readers, in which case we heart them and appreciate their loyalty and hope never to make them roll their eyes at us. (How’s that for a disclaimer? We don’t want Channel Editor Kori Ellis to give us a punt in the pants or anything.)
Really, it’s enough to want to make a sports bloggerette get all snarky or somethin’.
Tags: Baseball, HumorRelated Stories
POSTED IN: Baseball
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