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5 Reasons That Chick Dropped the Randy Moss Case

by Jodie Lynn Boduch on March 12th, 2008

Remember Rachelle Washington, the woman who put a restraining order on Randy Moss? She’s dropped the case against the New England Patriots WR.

We can’t know for sure, but here are 5 possible reasons she may have done so:

1. She’s now satisfied with the hex she placed on the Patriots. Oh, don’t ask which one. You know the choke game in question.

2. Tom Brady arm charm Gisele Bundchen threatened to smear Washington’s name so that shop girls in every Victoria’s Secret across the country would point and snicker whenever she walked into the store.

3. Eli and Peyton Manning, whom we think invented this hare-brained scheme while sitting around on the set of that stupid Double Stuff Oreos commercial, decided they didn’t want to do business with her anymore.

4. She realized that the drama surrounding her claim was mighty high (as well as high and mighty) prior to the Super Bowl, but now that the Pats lost, she’s a mere footnote. Even Bill Belichick’s red hoodie will be better remembered. Note to Rachelle: When an article of clothing gets more notoreity that you, get out while you still can.

5. Spygate junkie Senator Arlen Specter told her, “Don’t worry kid, we’ve got it from here.”

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