May 11th, 2008
Nothing brings a team together like a good old-fashioned brawl.
Unless, of course, the brawlers are all wearing the same jersey and your cornerback is in a shoving match with your defensive back.
But that’s exactly what happened at the Baltimore Ravens‘ minicamp on Saturday. Almost the entire 85-man squad acted like third graders at recess settled things the gentlemanly way after RB Allen Patrick was taken down hard.
Now it’s Mother’s Day today (Happy Mother’s Day, Ma!), but we’re willing to bet a few of those Raven boys will get a talkin-to from their Moms before she accepts any candy, flowers, or mom-esque gifts from them today. (Thanks to devoted reader Caesar for sending us the story.)
Who started it? After Patrick got nailed, Oniel Cousins (Offensive Tackle) and Amon Gordon (Defensive Tackle) were moved to fisticuffs over the, oh, let’s call it unnecessary roughness.
The rest was a two-minute NFL pigpile.
T-E-A-M-W-O-R-K everyone! Hey, maybe that’s what they need to settle them down, the cheerleaders.
Calling all Baltimore Ravens cheerleaders: Please report to minicamp for the sake of your team’s safety.
Image: Used courtesy of www.newscom.com
Tags: allent patrick, amon gordon, baltimore ravens, cheerleaders, Football, gossip, NFL, oniel cousinsShare This
By Jodie -- 0 comments
May 10th, 2008
IRL hottie and interview rambler Danica Patrick hit a pit crewman—no, not her own—in yesterday’s Indy 500 practice. Fortunately Charles Buckman, the man struck by Patrick’s Andretti Green Racing No. 7 car, didn’t sustain any long-term injuries. (Thanks for sending this, Pat!)
Expect every late-night talk show host on the air and a whole lotta blogs to make jokes about women drivers now.
But can you blame them? Check it out (46s):
Tags: auto racing, charles buckman, danica patrick, hit crewman, indy 500, irl, strikes crewmanShare This
By Jodie -- 0 comments
May 10th, 2008
Sports By Brooks posted an article that made our New England Patriots-loving heart, in all it’s rah-rah Bill Belichick glory, break in a few pieces. (That’s really only the because our heart is frozen solid and we happen to drop it on the floor while reading the story. Not to worry; we patched it up again and threw it back in the freezer.)
Anyhow, Indianapolis Colts coach Tony Dungy took a Tony the Tiger-sized swipe at the Pats during a visit to a Tampa, FL high school. Via Sports By Brooks, Tampa Tribune writer Joe Henderson cites Dungy’s response to a Spygate-ish question someone in the crowd raised:
“We talk about how important it is to do things the right way and have integrity so that when you do win, people can never ask that question . . . no one is really going to ask, ‘Did they cheat? Did they do things the right way?’ I think our record speaks for itself and if you’re a true champion, that’s the way you’d like it to be.“
Tony Dungy, before, after, or possibly during his slap-in-the-face to the Patriots.
Image: Used courtesy of www.newscom.com
In other words, by Dungy’s definition, the Patriots aren’t trued champions. But at least Coach D is nice about it.
That’s why we no doubt speak for numerous Pats fans when we say, “Tony Dungy, FOAD*. But in a nice way, ya big lug.”
*FOAD=F*** Off And Die. Meant to be funny, not a command to be taken literally. (Hey, better to overexplain, right?)
Tags: bill-belichick, Football, gossip, indianapolis-colts, new-england-patriots, NFL, sports by brooks, tony dungyShare This
By Jodie -- 4 comments
May 9th, 2008
Open-car racer Danica Patrick was a media wunderkind long before winning her first race at the Indy Japan 300 last month. So it’s not the biggest shock ev-ah to hear that she’s been swamped with interviews lately.
Image: Used courtesy of www.splashnewsonline.com
But we had to chuckle upon reading Patrick’s words during an interview with FOX Sports:
It’s been so busy and I think that’s one of the things people don’t realize how much work it is to answer questions and do interviews. I put a lot into it. At the end of the day after a bunch of interviews, I’m really tired emotionally. I always want to give people a good interview. I want to give them honest answers. I’m not trying to beat around the bush about stuff. I put a lot of heart and soul into my interviews.
Two things here. First of all, maybe the reason interviews exhaust Danica so much is because it takes her seven sentences comprised of 84 words to say “I put so much effort into interviews I’m wiped out afterwards.” (One sentence, 11 words, same idea).
Second, we’ll save you the trouble if you’re hoping for questions along the lines of, “Can you describe what it was like to do the Sports Illustrated: Swimsuit Issue shoot this year?” or “Would you ever reconsider Playboy’s offer?” This interview is mostly IRL, except for a what-did-they-ruin-it-with-that-for question referencing politics.
Tags: auto racing, danica patrick, gossip, indy car, irl, japan indy 300, playboy, Racing, sports illustrated swimsuit issueShare This
By Jodie -- 2 comments
May 9th, 2008
Friday is a good day to tidy things up, do some filing, and clear off the desk. Lucky for us, the following two items are a cinch to categorize.
For the Things That Are Cool folder: Kobe Bryant of the LA Lakers winning the NBA’s MVP award. We aren’t Kobe fans or anything but hey, the guy did have a stellar season.
For the Things That Not Only Aren’t Cool But Are Downright Ridiculous folder: Kobe’s wife Vanessa wearing a purple tutu on the floor as she and the cutie pie kids congratulated him. (If we had a dime for every WTF? uttered in the arena at that moment . . .)
Image: Used courtesy of www.newscom.com
Bryant, who was also the only unanimous pick for the NBA All-Star first team, was awarded the trophy just prior to Game 2 against the Utah Jazz. (The Lakers won 120-110 with 34 points for Bryant).
Apparently Vanessa didn’t know about the ceremony and had to rush in from ballet practice.
Either that or Lindsay Lohan stole her stuff . . .
Tags: Basketball, game 2, gossip, kobe bryant, la lakers, mvp, nba, playoffs, sports gossip, utah jazz, vanessa, wifeShare This
By Jodie -- 0 comments
May 8th, 2008
The other day we linked Elisha Cuthbert and Calgary Flames defenseman Dion Phaneuf together in the form of a question, Jeopardy!-style.
Jeanne Dupuis at b5’s Hockey Beat has the photographic evidence (to complement an earlier round of Hawaiian beach frolicking) that changes the hook-up from wishy-washy query to a very definite exclamation point.
And we’re going to leave that double entendre exactly where it is, thank you. We don’t want to compromise our self-imposed PG-13 rating.
Elisha Cuthbert looking to see what all the fuss is about.
Image: Used courtesy of www.newscom.com
Is anyone else kinda rooting against them just to see if Cuthbert will keeping making the rounds in the NHL? Phew! We thought it was just us.
Tags: calgary flames, Celebrities, dion phaneuf, elisha cuthbert, Hockey, NHLShare This
By Jodie -- 0 comments
May 8th, 2008
First-class traitor Former New England Patriots assistant Matt Walsh touched base with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell this week. The purpose? To assess Walsh’s proof of things like the Patriots taping the St. Louis Rams at a pre-Super Bowl XXXVI practice in 2002.
Usually, when you’re talking about evidence supporting a videotape claim, said evidence is—wait for it—the videotape itself. Not eight other videotapes of signals involving other teams and other games. Somehow Walsh, who turned over those irrelevant-the-Rams-issue tapes, must subscribe to the logic “If X=Y and Z=Y, then A=B because, well, because I said so.”
Or something like that.
Michael Levy, Walsh’s lawyer, added yet another “WTF?” to the mix by stating (per ESPN) that
“Mr. Walsh has never claimed to have a tape of the walk-through . . . Mr. Walsh has never been the source of any of the media speculation about such a tape. Mr. Walsh was not the source for the Feb. 2 Boston Herald article.”
So let’s get this straight: Walsh (and two others) videotaped for the Patriots during the timeframe in question. Walsh gave up tapes. But he didn’t turn over evidence of the high-profile allegation linking his name to the Rams case. (Google ”Matt Walsh” and “St. Louis Rams.” We garnered 44,200 hits. Now go re-read Levy’s comments).
This makes less sense than the fact that Paris Hilton pulled down $150K for partying at a London nightclub.
Oh, and given that the eight tapes are consistent with what the Pats already ‘fessed up to, there’s no news here. Somebody–Walsh, his lawyer, the Boston Herald, the Patriots, the NFL–has some ’splainin’ to do about this mess.
What’s more idiotic: Matt Walsh not providing a Pats-Rams Super Bowl tape or the realization that someone paid Paris Hilton $150K to show up at a London nightclub?
Image: Used courtesy of www.splashnewsonline.com
Tags: Football, matt walsh, new-england-patriots, NFL, nfl commissioner, roger goodell, st. louis rams, super bowl xxxvi, videotapeShare This
By Jodie -- 2 comments
May 7th, 2008
It’s not unusual for a fan to wear the jersey of his or her favorite player. This bloggerette has one for Daisuke Matsuzaka and one for Tom Brady and (best of all) a Bill Belichick hoodie.
But who among us would wear a fan shirt every day for four years?
Twelve-year-old David Witthoft, for one.
Indeed, the fan of the Green Bay Packers QB received a Brett Favre #4 jersey for his 7th birthday, and for the next 1,561 days it was the gift that kept on giving.
Image: Used courtesy of www.newscom.com
What end does setting such a record serve? If it’s supposed to be future small talk on a first date, it could completely backfire. Imagine this a few years down the road:
Boy: So, do you remember hearing about this kid who wore a Brett Favre shirt for over four years? That was . . . well, that was me. *Boy grins sheepishly*
Girl: Really? Wow!
Boy: Pretty cool, huh?
Girl: Actually, no. That was a “How messed up is that?” wow, not a “That’s awesome!” wow. First of fall, I’m now wary about your potential hygiene and fashion pitfalls. Second, anyone obsessive enough to wear a quarterback jersey that long could be stalker material. Third, if you live in Connecticut you should be a Tom Brady fan. Screw Favre.
Ouch.
Yeah, some people might think this is cute, but we’re inclined to see the snarky side thanks to two scary thoughts we can’t get out of our head.
Scary thought #1: Were it not for the whole getting older-still growing thing, how long might this tomfoolery have lasted? Which leads us to . . .
Scary thought #2: What if he relapses at, say, age 35 and wants to recapture the glory? Not sure how “cute” it would be for an adult to wear the same article of clothing daily for years. Usually we when we see people like that they’re also wearing a wool coat in July and holding a “Will Work for Food” sign.
Tags: bill-belichick, brett favre, daisuka matsuzaka, Fans, green-bay-packers, jersey, tom-bradyShare This
By Jodie -- 0 comments
May 6th, 2008
David Kindervater at Every Morning Quarterback here on b5 mentioned that the Dallas Cowboys will star in the HBO series Hard Knocks.
Of course, the Dallas Cowboys means Tony Romo. And we all know that for the past few months, Tony Romo means Jessica Simpson. And Jessica Simpson on film means *cues dramatic music* straight to DVD.
Is it a risk the team is willing to take? Or will the busty blonde be banned from the set like Kim Kardashian should be from reality shows, the red carpet, and the history of naughty tapes?
Time will tell.
P.S. Jessica Simpson is truly a gift from the Blog Deities. We just got our Glamour magazine and let’s just say that concerning the quotable quotes we alluded to in the previous post . . . there’s more where that came from and then some. Stay tuned.
Tags: Celebrities, dallas-cowboys, hard knocks, hbo series, jessica-simpson, NFL, tony-romoShare This
By Jodie -- 0 comments
May 6th, 2008
Q. How do you know your status as pop culture punchline has gone mainstream?
A. When the Commander in Chief of the most powerful nation on earth cites you as a bad luck charm.
And given George W.’s low approval rating, that’s saying something.
Indeed, People.com quotes the President—a Republican, for those of you who’ve been residing under a rock in Fiji since 2000 (and you know who you are)—as saying “We’re going to send Jessica Simpson to the Democratic National Convention.” The joke is a reference to Simpson’s presence at Tony Romo’s games, which coincided with the Dallas Cowboys QB’s worst career outing.
Image: Used courtesy of www.splashnewsonline.com
And yes, blogs like this one did their fair share of perpetuating the notion that Simpson is unluckier than a black cat walking under a ladder and then smashing a mirror when it gets to the other side, all on Friday the 13th.
As for Simpson, she’s been sporting a ring on The Finger (not the one you salute fellow drivers with; the one to the left of that one). Ashlee’s big sis also gushes about the benefits of being Romo’s cake feeder and arm charm, namely that she doesn’t have to present herself a “deeper,”more profound,” or “more intellectual.”
What a relief. Few things are scarier than the thought of Jessica Simpson trying to hash out existentialist philosophy and the significance of death in 19th century Russian literature while sipping espresso in an indie coffeehouse somewhere. We’ve been spared!
Tags: dallas-cowboys, democratic national convention, jessica-simpson, NFL, nfl-quarterbacks, president george w bush, republican, tony-romoShare This
By Jodie -- 2 comments
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